Grief and Losing Someone You Love

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Grief: 10 Things That Can Help You Heal

I want to talk about something that a lot of people go through, but nobody really talks about enough: grief.

Losing someone you love can turn your whole world upside down. One minute you are going about your normal day, and the next minute you realize that person isn’t there anymore.

And honestly, there is no right way to grieve.

You might cry all day. You might not cry at all. You might be okay for a few days and then suddenly break down because you heard a song or smelled a perfume that reminded you of them. That doesn’t mean you are going backward. It just means you miss someone you loved.

As a psychic, I speak with people who are hurting and looking for some kind of comfort. Many people ask me if their loved one is still around them or if the little things they notice could be a sign.

I always tell people to trust what feels meaningful to them. Sometimes it can be a dream, a song, a memory, or something that happens at just the right time. Whatever you believe, those little moments can bring a lot of comfort.

Here are 10 things I think can help when you are going through grief.

1. Let yourself cry.

Don’t worry about looking strong. If you need to cry, cry. You lost someone important to you. You are allowed to be sad.

2. Talk about them.

Don’t feel like you have to stop saying their name. Talk about them. Tell stories. Talk about the funny things they used to do. Sometimes remembering the good times can help.

3. Don’t listen to people who tell you to “move on.”

There is no set amount of time for grief. Everyone is different. You may feel better in a few months, or you may still have hard days years later. That’s okay.

4. Get out of the house.

Even if you don’t feel like it, go for a little walk. Sit outside. Get some fresh air. You don’t have to do anything big. Just getting out can help clear your mind.

5. Take care of yourself.

When you are grieving, it’s easy to forget about yourself. Try to eat something, drink some water, get some sleep, and take a shower. It sounds simple, but it really does matter.

6. Write to the person you lost.

This is something I really like. Get a piece of paper and write them a letter. Tell them what you miss. Tell them what you wish you could say. Tell them about what has happened since they left.

You don’t have to show anyone the letter. It’s just for you.

7. Keep their memories close.

Look at pictures. Keep something that belonged to them. Make a little memory box. Do whatever feels right for you.

You don’t have to put everything away just because they are gone.

8. Let people be there for you.

Sometimes people don’t know what to say when you are grieving. That’s okay. You don’t need someone to have the perfect words. Sometimes just having someone sit with you is enough.

Don’t be afraid to say, “I’m having a really bad day today.”

9. Pay attention to the little things.

Sometimes when we are missing someone, little things can make us stop and think of them. Maybe it’s their favorite song on the radio or seeing something they loved.

I believe those moments can be very special. At the very least, they give us a chance to remember the person and the love we shared.

10. Give yourself permission to be happy again.

This one can be really hard.

Sometimes people feel guilty when they laugh or have a good day after someone has passed away. Please don’t feel guilty for living your life.

Being happy does not mean you forgot them.

You are allowed to laugh. You are allowed to make new memories. You are allowed to enjoy your life while still missing the person you lost.

You Don’t Have to Forget Them to Heal

I don’t think healing means forgetting someone.

I think healing means learning how to live with the loss while still carrying the love you had for that person.

There will probably always be days when you miss them. There may always be certain songs, holidays, birthdays, or places that make you think about them.

And that’s okay.

If you are going through grief right now, please be patient with yourself. Take it one day at a time. Some days will be easier than others.

You don’t have to have it all figured out.