Relationship

13 posts, 11 voices

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yes, he loves you. But it’s what kind of love which he and you need to make known to each other. You could approach it like – I know you love me, and you know I love you. Do you want to tell me anything because I’d like to work this out with you somehow…. Ask him open ended statements – I think you’d like/I’d like to tell me/you about…. I’m probably wrong but I feel that maybe you want to tell me that you love me…. Know what I mean? He might be worried you’re looking for commitment and that if he says he loves you, you’d take it to mean he wants to marry you. He wants to know first where you stand, so he can tell you how he feels?

hey, so all of a sudden i feel lost again i was going so good and now i dont know. i feel like i dont understand anything. so i ended up telling the guy that i dont expect anything from him and that yes i like him but in a different way and that i dont want to hurt him and he just didnt really wanna talk about it so i was just like whatever. then i saw him again the next day and he was fine and then i sent him a text message and now he is ignoring me? what the hell is going on its upsetting me and im only doing what he aid he wanted me to do which was be happy…argh! can anyone help me please i dont get him!

It may be several mixed messages you are sending to him, and possibly yourself. For instance, you say one thing to him – like you don’t expect anything from him, but the next minute send him a text which indicates you want a reply. He tells you he wants you to be happy, because he doesn’t want the guilt and pressure that it’s his responsibility to make you happy. He senses your confusion. To him, it’s like one minute you’re the fun independent girl he dated the next you’re insecure and needy of his attention. I’m not saying you can’t express your feelings and vulnerability, but you have to do it in a way which engages him rather than makes him feel like you’re depending on him. Yes, unfortunately, it seems like women can’t do anything right and we always have to tread on eggshells around men. But the thing is that when we stop doing that and just don’t care what they think of us, and learn to be happy with ourselves then we can’t get rid of them. But as soon as we think this guy really understands me and connects with me and gives me everything and I just want to be with him, then they run a mile. It’s stupid. We have to do ALL the work and suffer all the heartache because we are made up of these stupid hormones!! Personally I’m in a position where I’ve read about all this sort of stuff and am trying to practise it, but am having to work so hard to learn how to be in a positive happy place every time I feel “is he…isn’t he…?” And what I get really angry and upset about, I’m sure you do too, is that he can just get on with his day probably not thinking about me. Men are like tom cats, they live for the moment, have sex with whoever and whatever they like without recriminations, they appreciate being fed properly, want to play about but only want emotional attachment on their terms… I don’t know if this helps you at all, but thanks for the opportunity to get this off my chest!!

yes hehe know exactly how u feel. like ahh i know we have a connection and i move on and then he ropes me in again and then is like whatever, when i saw him he didnt kiss me and i said y didnt u kiss me and he was like well u havent kissed me the last 2 times ive seen u so i thought thats what u wanted and i thought it was on him. he keeps looking at me and its like he is about to say something and then doesnt and i feel like saying just say whatever it is u want to say. he gets really jealous of other guys and stares intensly when other guys talk to me hmmm MEN!...my family and friends keep saying dont let him go give him time because they realise im starting to move on and just enjoy the moment and to give him time…and i said this to him because i just wanted to tell him that i relly dont expect anything from him (not saying i would like it because i would) i just dont have expectations from him anymore. he seemed distant and upset a bit and didnt really say anything. can someone tell me what his feeling and if his ok?

Don’t like the jealousy bit of this guy. They get sulky and possessive and this is another form of control because they get your attention and make you feel bad. Just ignore him. Try and find a positive place within yourself so you are the one roping him in and so this guy doesn’t hold you back. Your family and friends know you best. Do they really think he’s doing you any good and bringing out the best in you? Or do they see you up and down and all over the place because you don’t know where you’re at with his on/off attitude and sulking?

i need help. i need guidance. i feel as if nothing is right anymore. i feel depressed day in day out. can someone please explain to me what is happening?

hey hun im lea, if i can have your date of birth i will give you guidance. godbless

Hi

He is mirroring your behaviour your playing games with him and he with you I suggest you step back and have a read of christian carters work catchem and keepem you will learn alot.

Best of luck

To reply to this with accuracy please send me yours and his birth details

nirthdates 22/4/88 and 2/4/86

so ive given birthdates can anyone please help me? i really need it!

Sure but I dont think you really want to share what I have found in here…so call me when you get the chance

sorry i am unable to afford im studying full time and still trying to buy all my books for the semester. so at the moment i can’t so feel free to share it here thanks